February 27, 2002 - 4:27 pm

just got home from the golf club, and i have some free time before i bartend tonight.... nice to have free time isn't it? sorry it's been a couple days since i updated, but i didn't really want to write about stuff that's been goin on... i don't feel like getting in trouble about some of it. i'm fine, i was fine, nothing bad happened to me. so don't worry so much ok? but at the same time, it's nice to have somebody worry about me, even if i don't know who is and isn't thinking about me, it's nice to know people care.

i've come to a decision. i want somebody. i don't think i want a relationship right now, but somebody who i can have the perks with would be perfect. i even know that i wouldn't get with other people if i had the opportunity. i just don't think i can handle the commitment right now, i'm still healing. but, somebody who would be willing to have the benefits with me and wait til i was ready for a commitment would be absolute heaven to me right now..... and seeing as how every conquest i have i will never have for reasons that are guessable, i don't think i should worry about it. i think i'm going to be lonely for quite some time....

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